Stress and How to Deal With It

Many years ago, our parents worked as hard as we are working today; situations were equally challenging. Yet they never said ‘I feel stressed.’ They went about their daily tasks happily as part of the routine, fulfilling their duties.

Later, we started using the word ‘stressed’ commonly to describe our state of mind. We like to say that we are stressed to indicate that we are working very hard, even going beyond our regular duties. It serves in pampering the ego in some ways.
We overlook the fact that that we are originally happy, peaceful and powerful souls, capable of handling every predicament or crisis that we face. But for some reason, we like to tell others and more importantly ourselves, that we are stressed.

Stress is a result of our creation of wrong thoughts. It is an emotional pain that indicates that something in us needs to change. But when we see everyone around us feeling hassled, we accept that experiencing a little stress is natural in today’s times. That is not true.

Any amount of stress is emotionally and psychologically damaging. We must increase inner strength to reduce stress and become stable, peaceful and happy. It’s true that in certain situations we cannot control the situation; we must control our state of mind by increasing mental strength through meditation and faith in God.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

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Negative Impact Of Social Media on Mental Health and How to Deal With It

Do you reach for your phone soon after waking up in the morning?

Courtesy: Google

The digital world has made it difficult for us to connect with reality.
While we check our phone or iPad to read messages or news, we must assess the quality of content we consume. If you’re spending an excessive amount of time on social media and feelings of sadness, dissatisfaction, anger, frustration, or despair are impacting your life, it may be time to re-examine your online habits and find a healthier balance.

Today our phone as well as our mind is flooded with excessive information. Consequently, we absorb draining energies of violence, greed, hatred, envy, ridicule and manipulation. We are burdened with anger, fear, anxiety and stress.

The media has made it a business to sell fear, spread panic and create unnecessary drama. We are bombarded with negativity and there is a tragic frenzied display of serious insanity being played out moment by moment. The idea is, close your eyes and ears to it. It can have an adverse effect on your mental well-being.

To keep our thoughts pure and positive, we must filter the information we are taking in. We are drowning in a content overdose. Restrict your daily media intake. With less distraction, your time will be more productive and your mind will be relaxed.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

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Twitter: @SedulousSpeak

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Set Boundaries For Your Well-being

We often complain that other people don’t treat us with the respect we deserve. They don’t even care about our feelings when they talk rudely to us or insult us.

Have you ever considered that to a large extent, we ourselves are responsible for this ill-treatment that we receive from them?

Image courtesy: Unsplash

The primary reason for such demeaning behavior is that we fail to set boundaries. People consistently disrespect us or overstep their limits. At such times, it is up to us to convey to others when they have crossed the line of decent behavior. However, we fail to do so in order to avoid conflicts.

When we set boundaries, we make it clear how we expect to be treated. This in turn makes for healthy relationships.

Also remember, ‘as you sow, so you reap.’ Just as you expect other people to recognize boundaries, the same applies to you. Never take undue advantage of someone’s decency. Always respect boundaries.

Also, when you respect yourself, you set the standards for others to give you due respect. You can earn respect through your good deeds, one of which is to build the self-esteem of others by treating them with dignity. Being well-mannered sends a positive signal to those you interact with and develops your social skills.

How do you set boundaries with others and how has it helped you to preserve your mental well-being? Please share your thoughts.

Thanks for reading. 

– Datta Sanghvi

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A Positive Mindset Makes For a Productive Day

We spend a lot of energy imagining and trying to predict what is going to transpire through the day. Much of what we expect to happen spells disaster for the most part.

Image courtesy: Unsplash

When you focus on the negative things that might happen, it’s easy to become emotionally and mentally paralyzed. Imagine, you have roughly 60,000 thoughts passing through your mind in a day, most of which are negative. Now imagine what damage may be caused to your mental well-being and subsequently your physical health!

Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts in the forefront. Don’t give in to negativism. You may be hesitant because you’ve failed in the past, or you’re fearful of even trying. Just because things did not work out before does not mean that it will be the outcome every time.

Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning, a starting point. So shed the shackles of self-doubt and walk the new path.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

Would love to connect:

Twitter: @SedulousSpeak

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What are you Grateful for Today?

We go through life, day by day, without taking the time to count our blessings. We take for granted all that we possess and all that we are surrounded by. But, have you ever considered how your life would change if you were deprived of even one or two of these things? Wouldn’t you be disappointed, or worse, wouldn’t panic set in?

What if your family wasn’t with you when you suffered a medical emergency?

Imagine that you didn’t have anyone with whom you could share the joy and pride of getting your first salary!

What would you do if one day you lost your home, your wealth or all your possessions?

Who can visualise this world devoid of its natural beauty, it’s flora and fauna? And what about the air you breathe?

Each moment of the day, I express gratitude to God for all that He has given me – my family members and their love, good health, happiness, the clean environment, peace, harmony and several other priceless treasures.

Can anyone even imagine their life devoid of the love and support of their family? I, for one, couldn’t. I thank God daily for this blessing. Family, friends, teachers, mentors and well-wishers have your back every step of the way. So what if you live miles away from each other? So what if you don’t keep in touch regularly? Regardless of time and distance, they stand by you in good times and bad and guide you when you are at crossroads.

One of the most precious gifts of God is good health – not just yours but that of your loved ones too. When you enjoy physical and mental well – being, you are happy and at your productive best, whether at home or at your workplace. So, value this gift of God and take care of your mind and body. With regular exercise and healthy eating habits, your body is taken care of, but don’t forget to feed your mind with positive thoughts. Stay away from negativity and toxic people who drain your energy.

Happiness, peace, joy and love are dependent on each other. When there is love in your personal life and peace, understanding and cooperation in your working relationships, you will surely experience satisfaction and happiness. You will taste success and grow your soul power. Hang on to these gifts, don’t lose them through your foolishness or greed!

Well, God had surely given us a clean environment and pristine beauty of nature, but what have we done to it? We have definitely not appreciated it. Instead of nurturing and taking care of our surroundings and keeping the air clean, we have exploited all the gifts of nature and caused irreversible destruction. If only God can forgive us for this!

All the comforts and luxuries that you enjoy are the result of your intellect, hard work, dedication, honesty and determination. Everyone has these qualities, but not everyone utilises them. Be thankful to God that He gave you the ability, capacity and good sense to walk the right path. He is the one who holds your hand and guides you every step of the way. You may actually be just one of the few who follow His will.

Yes, it’s also true that life has it’s own twists and turns. It’s certainly not a smooth ride. However, I believe that every setback, every unpleasant or devastating occurrence or cumbersome issue in your life is God’s way of making you tougher. It is meant to teach you how to be a fighter. It tests your resilience and turns you into a winner. Having had to go through several emotional upheavals in my life, I’ve understood that it can either break you or make you stronger. The choice is yours.

So, whatever is happening in my life, I affirm that I have complete faith in His mercy. I never forget to show gratitude every moment of every day and believe that whatever He has in store for me, it will always be in my interest.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

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Why you Must Stop Negative Self – Talk

Do these thoughts often trouble you? Do you often speak to yourself in this manner?

* I’m not good enough.

* It’s all my fault.

* I can never win. I’m a failure.

* Even if I try my best, I won’t succeed. What’s the point of trying?

* She looks much better than me. So people give her more attention.

* I’m so stupid! I keep making mistakes.

Negative self – talk is the most common factor that depletes our confidence and lowers self – esteem. Everyone has experienced it. The difference lies in how you respond to it and also how and to what extent you allow it to affect you.

The minute you make a mistake or falter, you start blaming yourself for it. It may have occurred unwittingly, yet you aren’t willing to give yourself the benefit of doubt. It’s easier to quickly pin the blame on yourself rather than to pause for a minute to analyse the situation and then reach a conclusion. Too much effort, isn’t it?

In fact, more often than not, the negativity arises from some imagined lack of qualities in yourself, as compared to someone else. There’s always someone prettier than you, luckier than you, more popular than you, richer than you, more efficient than you…phew!

Isn’t there?

However, have you ever considered on what basis you made those comparisons before mentally bashing yourself up for being so useless? Obviously not. The negativity and pessimism is so deeply ingrained in you that your first reaction is to create self – doubt. Your lack of self – belief doesn’t allow you to recognise your own special qualities-

~ your lovely features,

~ your ability to work towards your goals instead of depending on luck to get you there,

~ your family and friends who love you instead of having superficial relations which only exist online,

~ the wealth of compassion and love in you instead of fancy cars, a big house and designer clothes and

~ your skills and talents that make you unique.

Whenever you face a situation where you are tempted to make adverse judgments about yourself, stop and think. Ask yourself, are you really so weak – minded? When someone displays anger, frustration and rudeness to you, don’t allow their negative vibrations to impact you. Your own shortcomings cause you grief but when others fail to recognise your talents and abilities, you feel slighted. So, practise detachment and don’t allow the opinions of others to create self-doubt in you.

Some people are wiser. They may gently admonish themselves and get over it quickly. They make an effort to understand where they went wrong and learn from their mistake so that they don’t repeat it. This helps them to not only move on but also progress at every step.

Being multidimensional creatures, human beings are bound to experience both sadness and happiness, difficulty and comfort, anxiety and joy. But what is required is for you to make a conscious effort to shift your mindset from negativity to positivity. You will then have clarity and a more mature and better understanding of reality and your perception of your relationships – with others and with yourself, your surroundings and the world.

We all choose to have friends who are genuine, gentle, kind, compassionate and above all, encouraging. So, If you met yourself one day, would you want to be friends with yourself?

Think about it.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

Would love to connect:

Twitter: @SedulousSpeak

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Some More Daily Affirmations to Live a Meaningful Life

A 15 – Day Guide to Create a Life of your Choice (Part – 2)

In my previous blog, we started off on a journey of self – discovery with some daily affirmations. In this blog, I am sharing a few more to complete the 15 – day guide.

Before reading on, introspect –

* Instead of money, looks, fame or power, what if you measure success and judge the quality of your life by the number of people you positively impact each day?

* Count the number of times you helped a friend to relieve his anxiety, fear or disappointment after suffering a setback.

* Give priority to your health and self- care.

* Take pride in the compassion you extend, the risk you took responsibly to help someone, the number of helpless animals you fed, the temptations you avoided and the lives you touched.

Let your character win each day.

Choose any one affirmation daily – whichever you may find appropriate, and practice it consciously while going about your activities through the day. When you feel demotivated, remind yourself that you are creating your own beautiful universe.

Affirmation 8

I believe in karma. Whatever I put out into the world will return to me at some point or the other, often in unexpected ways. Being a good person, having no ill-will for anyone, living in harmony and minding my own business with no expectations makes for a good life.

Affirmation 9

Anger depletes the power of my soul and drains my physical and emotional energy. Anger and frustration act as a bondage. They shackle my mind with chains of resentment and discontent. I fail to look beyond the narrow frame of bitterness and wallow in self – pity. When you allow someone else’s actions or words to affect you, you lose your own soul power. In the process, you take their karma onto yourself.

Affirmation 10

I do not indulge in mud-slinging. If I have a problem with someone’s behaviour or actions, I tell them and not others. Gossip and slander give out negative vibrations. This means that whoever indulges in gossiping has a low frequency. I prefer to adopt a straightforward approach and share pure vibes rather than spreading rumours or involving a third person. ‘More the Merrier’ definitely is not my cup of tea!

Affirmation 11

I will not lose hope in desperate situations. I believe that God is always with me, holding my hand and leading me from darkness to light. When I remain calm and stable and have patience keeping my faith in God, I will be able to pull myself out of the deep well of despair. In this way, I will pull myself out of seemingly hopeless situations. I know that God is my guiding light, He will never abandon me.

Affirmation 12

When I hold onto grudges, I lose focus of the real purpose of life. Instead of focusing on enriching my thoughts, I dwell on the other person’s actions, which, at any rate, should be of no consequence to me. How does it matter what someone said or did to me yesterday? Why should it affect me? Why should I continue thinking about it for hours or even days? It is their karma. Let them deal with it.

Affirmation 13

I am my own admirer and my own encourager. I don’t need someone else to validate my talents and my specialities. I have the confidence to recognise my strengths but also have the humility to acknowledge my shortcomings. This leaves me with scope for improvement.

Affirmation 14

I will not allow ego, envy and greed to control my mind. All these keep me in a state of perpetual stress and anxiety. I am constantly worried about my image and status as compared to someone else’s. I generally find myself lacking though I won’t admit it, even to myself. So, I resolve that I will not allow my ambition to lead me on the wrong path. I would rather lead a life of happiness, peace and contentment.

Affirmation 15

When I embark on my journey to the next life, I will shed this physical body but what I will take along is my mind and soul. So, it makes sense for me to strengthen my soul power and improve the quality of my thoughts.

Have faith in God and set out on this enlightening journey.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

Would love to connect:

Twitter: @SedulousSpeak

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15 Daily Affirmations for a Meaningful Life

A 15 – Day Guide to Create a Life of your Choice (Part – 1)

Thoughts are the seeds of your feelings, words and actions. The quality of the plant depends on the quality of the seed. So, doesn’t it make sense to pay heed to the kind of thoughts that overwhelm you, or even hound you, all through the day, and indeed, throughout your life? After all, these thoughts will impact every sphere of your life.

What begs question is, knowing that we are bombarded with negativity by the media on a daily basis, why are we so eager to devour such information as soon as it is posted? Not only that, we share it enthusiastically with other people as well. In the process, we lower their positivity quotient as well.

When you consciously erase the dark shades of pessimism, despondency, frustration and cynicism from your mind, the canvas of your soul will be largely coloured with bright and attractive colours of positivity and optimism.

So, the idea is to feed your mind with thoughts of happiness, peace, love, harmony, humility, gratitude and joy. Allow such empowering emotions to fill your heart and soul to lead a life devoid of stress and anxiety.

These are a few positive daily affirmations that will uplift you and set you off on a journey of self – discovery. Choose any one affirmation daily – whichever you may find appropriate, and practice it consciously while going about your activities through the day.

Practise these affirmations mindfully to eliminate negativity and hopelessness from your life and to enrich your mind. When you feel demotivated, remind yourself that you are creating your own beautiful universe.

Affirmation 1

My happiness is my own choice and my own creation; it is not dependent on any external factor. I build and nurture my inner world lovingly with my positivism. There is no reason for me to rely on circumstances to experience joy. I train my mind to see the best case scenario and interpret each situation optimistically. I truly believe that with the right effort and mindset, I will get the desired results.

Affirmation 2

I use my special qualities to help others whenever they require my assistance. However, I realise that I am not doing anyone a favour; I do it because it makes me happy. If God has given me a talent and I utilise it, it gives me pleasure. In the process, if I happen to help someone, I don’t expect anything in return. It is a means of expressing my speciality. Besides, if I expect something in return, I may have to face disappointment, which may mar my happiness. So, the real joy is in giving with humility.

Affirmation 3

I do not waste my energy worrying about what might happen. I live in the present with full attention. Each moment I breathe is a blessing of God and I am grateful for it. I know that everything I do adds to my karmic account. So, without paying much heed to what will happen in the future, or what has happened in the past, I perform good deeds in the present. If I dwell too much on the future, I will not enjoy the present.

Affirmation 4

I hold myself responsible for my actions and refrain from blaming others when things go wrong. What I say, do or don’t do is within my power. So, I hold myself accountable for my actions and no one else.

Affirmation 5

When I am faced with an adverse situation, I remain calm. I gather my wits and come up with an appropriate solution. Panic is a sign of a weak mindset. With determination, I can confidently make decisions to resolve issues.

Affirmation 6

If something feels wrong to me, I will not do it. I trust my intuition. I cannot be enticed to compromise my principles for any reason. Rather than rely on someone else’s interpretation of the situation , I will go with my gut instinct – it is generally right.

Affirmation 7

Being kind and honest does not depend on the situation. It is an integral part of my nature. Whether in personal or professional issues, being kind, compassionate and upright is always a priority. Being sly, cunning or dishonest may work to my advantage temporarily, but ultimately people will look through my wrong intentions and I will be exposed. So, I will shun that path.

Have faith in God and set out on this enlightening journey.

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

Would love to connect:

Twitter: @SedulousSpeak

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Maintain Harmony in Relationships

Ask yourself :

Have you ever found yourself in the midst of an argument that you never wanted to start in the first place?

After arguing with someone, do you worry about what effect the argument will have on your relationship?

Do you regret sacrificing a relationship for the sake of winning a point?

Are you overwhelmed with feelings of regret and / or shame after an argument even though you gained the upper hand?

If your answer to any or all of these is a definite ‘yes’, then you need to introspect.

Don’t entangle with people whose emotional fequency is low. It’s more important to maintain the harmony in your relationships rather than winning an argument. Put forth your opinion and withdraw. Radiate pure and positive energy and convey your best wishes despite any differences, so that your pure vibrations will help them raise their frequency. Focus only on their specialities.

Give primacy to harmony and peace in your relationships.

It is more important to live your truth, rather than to prove your truth to anyone.

Don’t lower your energy to prove yourself right. Value your mental peace and happiness more than winning an argument over an issue, however important it may seem to you. It may lead to disappointment.

Let your ego be subordinate to your joy.

Thanks for reading.

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

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How to Deal With Disappointment

Ask Yourself :

When you hope or expect something to happen in your favour, do you find yourself to be overly optimistic?

Do you fervently hope for your wish to come true and promptly start making elaborate and detailed plans in anticipation, without considering the flip side?

Do you neglect to make an alternative plan, just in case things don’t work out the way you expect them to?

Have you ever felt so depressed when things didn’t go as planned that you readily gave up and refused to start over?

If your answer to any or all of these questions is ‘yes’, then you must surely be an expert at dealing with disappointment! The reason is that most of us prepare for success, but rarely does anyone plan for failure. It’s not your fault, you’ve probably never been taught how to do so!

Truth is, setbacks are inevitable. You may have, at some point, disappointed yourself or someone else, but a word of caution – Never allow self-doubt to creep in. You know and admit you could have done better, that’s a big step forward in remedying the situation. Don’t allow cynicism to jeopardise your relationship – with others or with yourself!

If and when you meet with disappointment in your effort or plan, remember Albert Einstein (yes, the great physicist) was four years old before he could speak and seven before he could read. This future genius and Nobel Prize winner, often dozed off in class and actually performed poorly in his early school days.

Disappointment is a regular feature in our lives. None of us can avoid it completely; more importantly none of us can claim to always have things going our way. The difference is, how each one of us reacts and responds when faced with an unfavourable outcome or an adversity. How you handle such issues says a lot about your character.

The key here is to have realistic expectations. Obviously, you can’t run the marathon at the first attempt when you are a sprinter! That doesn’t imply that you shouldn’t be hopeful or ambitious, but it would help if you can evaluate your capacity and / or shortcomings at the outset and then set your goals. This technique will also help you to improve and raise the bar as and when required without the worry of failure looming over you.

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.” – Robert Kiyosaki

The idea is to understand what caused the setback. Analyse where your plan was lacking, the quality of effort that was required and the optimum use of resources that may have been missing. Use a positive approach to rectify the situation.

Most people succumb to pessimism and depression when their efforts don’t materialize. However, you must understand that ‘failure’ and ‘disappointment’ aren’t dirty words. Take them in your stride and use them to your advantage.

There is no shame in failing to meet your goals. In fact, it is a test of your will-power. Tell yourself that there is no way that you will sacrifice your dreams; instead you will plan and strategise again- this time with more focus, determination, efficient time-management, proper scheduling and maximum effort.

Don’t hesitate to ask for help / advice if required. We all need it, don’t we? It doesn’t make you look weak. On the contrary, it displays your resolve to succeed.

Remember, the road to happiness and success is neither straight nor smooth. It is a bumpy road with several curves and speed breakers. Whether you reach your destination or not depends entirely on you – it’s a test of your resilience!

Thanks for reading. 

Do share your thoughts in the comments section below.

– Datta Sanghvi

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